A Vertical Perspective of Life

'The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking

new landscapes but in having new eyes.'

-Marcel Proust

Many years ago my eldest son discovered and, ultimately, mastered the sport/skill of rock climbing.  One day, after I was finally able to calm my own fears about this new passion in his life, I asked him, “Why?  Why do you love this, what does it bring to your life, why do you DO it??!!” 

After explaining some of the physical and mental challenges involved in conquering a 3000-foot vertical slab of granite, he went on to express how his climbing skills had become useful in his everyday life.  His words struck me like a hammer and left me with a visual that would return over and over again, helping me through my own personal challenges, and as a powerful gem to share with my grief groups, and in both cases – many ah-ha moments!

In contemplating my blog assignment this week, I asked Matthew to please share those words of wisdom again.  He thoughtfully and eloquently obliged.  Below are his words – and my “like life” comments:

 “………Climbing, for the most part, is a team sport (like life: almost every minute of the day we are called upon to find harmony in our interpersonal relationships). Your teammate, however, is primarily there for safety and can really do nothing to help you once you’ve begun climbing. In this respect, it is a very individualistic endeavor. It is up to you, and only you, to accomplish your objective of reaching the top. You must overcome the obstacles you encounter with your own skills and strengths (like life: once past the age when our parents/caregivers are no longer responsible for our nurturing and wellbeing, we are basically on our own to choose the paths - ascending or descending- our lives will take).

“They say that climbing is 10% rubber (chance) and 90% mental (choice). Essentially, the rubber on your shoes will stick to just about any edge you put it on. The real challenge is in knowing that you have the skills to pull that next move, (conviction, courage) even when you’re 500 ft. off the deck (haven’t we all felt like we were flying without a net at one time or another?). In this respect, climbing is very mental. Being pushed out of your comfort zone (the easiest, quickest way) and overcoming a challenge is very rewarding (making the right decision, doing the right thing = feels good!!!).

“When you climb, especially difficult routes (a reoccurring part of life), it demands your total concentration (consciousness, integrity). Your world, in essence, shrinks to the size of what you can physically reach with your hands and feet (being in the present moment). Sometimes, you may get stuck (mental/physical/spiritual/existential roadblocks), not able to find a handhold or foothold to make upward progress with (indecision, worry, lack of support, loneliness). This is the point at which you must focus (see the truth in the situation) the most. Your arms start to burn and your legs start to shake (fear, depression, feeling overwhelmed), but you know that there’s got to be another handhold somewhere (hope). So, you hold on and step your feet up just a bit higher, (faith, trust, inner knowing) even an inch or two (slow and steady wins the race), and more handhold options usually appear (success, right action = joy, happiness, fulfillment).

“Many times you find that you’ve gone the wrong way (bad decisions, things that don’t work out as you’d hoped/unexpected, life changes, mistakes) and that you just can’t make any progress no matter how hard you try, the holds just aren’t there (doing the same thing over and over with the same – undesired - result). When this happens you need to reverse your moves and figure out where you got off route (what went wrong and what part did you play in it). It all comes down to efficiency, you can’t waste your energy trying to go the wrong way (it takes just as much effort to choose to be miserable as it does to choose to be happy), you need to back up and try a different approach (helping things go right, taking responsibility for your actions, making amends) or you’ll never have the energy to make it to the top (a joyful, fulfilling, good LIFE).”  

Thank you Matthew for helping me remember that when life is an uphill climb - shifting my perspective, trusting my instincts, taking responsibility, and using my innate and acquired skills, will help me find a way to the top.  Thank you for helping me see with new eyes.

“The man at the top of the mountain did not just fall there.” (anon)

Namaste,

Dorothy

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Dorothy:  My mantra for the week:  Life’s an uphill climb – drop the rocks!

Susan:  Be careful what you wish for … because you just may get it.  I’ve heard this phrase many times throughout my life and found that it’s very sage advice.  I’m analyzing my “wishes” so that I can determine what parts of them I truly want and need to have a fulfilling life.  When I’m clear about the outcome I’m wishing for, I’ve found my authentic wishes and dreams; my best self emerges and opportunities for fulfilling dreams are easier to recognize and act on.  

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