Defensive Driving and Other Good Choices

Life is the sum of all your choices.

  ~Albert Camus

Have you seen the car commercial where they simulate a crash and, upon impact and airbag deployment, the driver turns off the ignition, turns on the hazard lights and unlocks the doors – disaster averted!  It’s slowed down to about 30 seconds of viewing but probably equates to 3 seconds in real time. The assumption being that in 3 seconds - a heartbeat, a blink of the eye  - actions were taken that saved this man’s life.  Of course, the selling point of car in the commercial is that it comes equipped with these safe guards, its computers churn into action should an impact occur, so no human action – or thought - is required. 

We humans have to rely on our own good sense to prevent crashing into obstacles, though.  We have to mentally, and sometimes physically, turn off the knee jerk, old tape, ego based reactions to things that press our buttons, or are destructive to our or others’ happiness or well-being.  Though unlike the car in the commercial that automatically switches to safe-mode when things are going wrong, gratefully, we do have the capacity to override our human tendencies…it’s called choice.

The car commercial images flashed in my mind the other day when I found myself crashing into a situation with a guaranteed bad outcome. So, like the man in the commercial, I made some quick choices: I turned off the fuel….the presumptions and judgments in my head;  turned on the hazard lights … caution, caution …. stepped back, slowed down, took a deep breathe; and unlocked the doors …made the choice to exit gracefully.  Disaster averted – no casualties – no dark cloud hanging over the rest of the day/week.  3 seconds and nobody got hurt!   

Of course, it doesn’t always go that way.   Sometimes my awareness/reactions are dulled by the heat of the moment and I pass, what I USED TO THINK is, the point of no return.  However, I’m learning that even when things seem to be speeding toward impact, I can still choose right action and avoid the crash.  When caught up in an escalating argument or disagreement, I can choose to take a time out, I can choose not to fuel the fire by being honest about my motives, I can give up my need to win, I can simply say, “let’s stop.” 

On the road defensive driving serves us well.  So it is in life, too.  By being aware, by practicing respect and courtesy, by recognizing the “danger zones,” we can avoid both fender-benders and big crashes.

Drive safely!

Dorothy

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Dorothy:

The conversation at the yoga studio had turned to grousing and grumbling about the weather, when quietly a fellow student said, “But just think how much we’ll enjoy our beautiful tulips in July.”  The “vibe” in the room changed instantly, and I was reminded of the sentiments of our last blog.  How quickly we can change things by what we say.  By the expressions on all our faces, it was clear we had just shared an ah-ha moment.  Somewhat embarrassed to have been caught, as innocent as the “catching” was, spewing negativity out into the space; we were also delighted by the reminder of the extraordinary duality of our wonderful mountain environment.  With just a few thoughtful words the perspective, and the mood, of the other eight women in class had changed, and, in spite of the snow pelting the windows, I’m sure there were visions of beautiful tulips above all our savasana (relaxation) mats.  And, all was right with the world again!  Thank you Kathy.

Susan will not be joining me here this week as she is finding that life is, indeed, BUENO in beautiful, balmy Cabo!   I wish you inspiring sunrises, and peaceful sunsets my friend!

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