Don't Stop Believing

Don’t stop believing, hold on to that feeling.

Journey (The Rock Band)

Many times in my life I’ve succumbed to a dearth of pleasure and joy and let fear have the upper hand in determining my moods and my days.  The illness and death of a parent, sibling, or close friend; miscarriage, the break down and destruction of a marriage, or worry over finances are very stressful and painful, and overwhelm the joy of life.  At one time or another, all of these have had negative and depressing effects in my life. I have always tried to learn from difficulty and pain and then move forward.  But, moving forward doesn’t seem to happen quickly, and I have often thought that regaining my equilibrium might never occur.

 However, believing opportunity is all around and that something positive will come from pain has always been a powerful reason for me to look for the bright side.  It’s a start to escaping the negative cycle of loss and an opportunity to move in the opposite direction ... the abundance of hope, belief, joy, love, and opportunity. 

The catharsis happens for me by writing rather than verbalizing my pains and fears.  And it gives me opportunity to look at what I’ve written from different view points since I can review my musings another day, or even months later, with a different set of emotions and circumstances coloring my views. Often I’m startled by what I’ve written and find that I’ve changed my perspective completely. That makes me feel I’ve gained insight from the experience, therefore, something good has come from sorrow.

Determination and a deep belief that change is a good thing have helped carry me through my life to this point. I can usually find the silver lining in a problem; it may be tarnished, but still it’s a spark of something brighter.  Once I find that small speck of possibility, it becomes a carrot dangling in front of me that I can choose to reach for (or not) and find solutions to shine light on the darkness.  It’s not always easy to move to the positive side, but I have found time and again that something magic will happen in my life if I keep believing.

Susan